What it means to me

I wanted this post to be perfect, but I can't type through my tears very well.. bear with me.

"Rick, I never had the honor of meeting you, but I feel like I knew you, like you were my brother the same way that Shorrie, Leah and Max have become my siblings. I wish you were here to play with Colton, Anna Claire and Camden... to give them rides on your shoulder, throw the ball with them.. take Colton for a ride in your mustang that he loves so very much.. I truly believe that every once in a while, when he does something outrageous to make your momma and family laugh, that it is probably you, knowing that they need that joy in their life.. no one or nothing could ever fill the void that is felt with your death... know that you are thought about daily, talked about often and loved still to this very second... We feel you here with us, watching over us.. and yes, tears still fall on a regular basis in your memory, but you have left your family with so many happy memories, so many things for them to be proud of, that even with the tears there is laughter... Keep an eye on us always, especially these babies who I swear will grow up hearing stories about you.. and we will meet someday my friend.. of that I am sure.. Thank you for your sacrifice and for loving this country enough to die fighting.. Rest in Peace.. Semper Fidelis.. We love you."

Most every single person I know is excited about a three day weekend. Don't get me wrong, I am loving the fact that I don't have to go to work this Monday. But this year is different. This is the first year for me to observe this weekend with the respect and honor that it deserves.

Do you know what Memorial Day means? I looked it up to make sure I got it right. Memorial Day, originally called Decoration Day, is a day of remembrance for those who have died in our nation's service.

I cannot tell you how selfish and ignorant I feel that this, my 30th year on this Earth and I am almost brought to my knees at the meaning of this "Holiday". I have always used it as an excuse to either go home to spend time with my family, or an extra day to clean up my house, run errands or enjoy a book. My oh My how fickle I feel.

If you have read my blog any time in the past year, you have heard me go on and on about how lucky I am to have the Morris family in my life... for so many reasons. They have become our family, and have helped to fill a void that I have had in my heart for quite some time.

Ricky, Dana, Shorrie, Leah and Max Morris lost someone very special to them on March 18, 2004, their son and brother, Marine Pfc. Rick Morris Jr. I did not know them at the time, although, Jett worked with Ricky in Lubbock. I remember him coming home to tell me that one of his coworkers son's had died in Iraq. Since I had never met them, I thought that it would be best for me to just say a quick prayer for them, but not to intrude on their grief. Hindsight, I wish I would have gone.. I did not think of them again until we moved to Louisiana and I found out that they too were on this job. After Colton was born and I needed a babysitter, Jett told me to call Dana.. and lucky for me (and I hope her) we hit it off so well.

We never really talked about Rick at first.. the first real conversation I remember having about him was after Josh died.. Dana and Leah always could see through my fake smile.. and I remember Leah sitting me down and telling me the whole story surrounding her brothers death. She told me about the phone call at work, where they had told the family that he was hurt..... then hours later getting the news that he was gone.. she took me through the emotions of looking at her momma and daddy going through anguish that can only be described as a nightmare... we talked about going through the motions of planning the funeral.. how the family was able to lay his body out in the viewing room of their family cemetary, and actually spend the night before his burial with him.. Dana talked about how she rubbed his finger, and could feel the place where he had broken it years before.. They talk about the military funeral, the flag and purple heart they recieved in his honor.. and then they told me about having to leave him and come home... it is heartbreaking..


Not a week goes by that we don't talk about Rick in some form.. and it is usually accompanied by much laughter.. I would give anything to have known him..

Here is what is posted about Rick on one internet site:

Marine laid to rest in Louisiana

Associated Press

MONTEREY, La. — Marine Pfc. Rick Morris Jr., a football hero during his days at Monterey High School who was killed by mortar fire in Iraq, was buried in his hometown and remembered as a “gentle giant”.

Many said they believed Morris was talented enough to play college football after graduation, but instead, he decided to join the military.

More than 300 family members and friends came Thursday to pay their last respects to the United States Marine who lost his life seven days earlier in a mortar attack in Al Qaim, Iraq.

They recalled that Morris, 20, never hesitated in spurning the gridiron for his true passion — service to country.

After delivering an emotional eulogy during the service, Morris’ sister Leah fought back tears while she spoke.

“There sure are more people here than I expected,” she said. “It’s what he deserved, and he’s earned this.”

Her brother had served only 17 days in the field after arriving in Iraq.

Nevertheless, the Rev. Russell Crum, the pastor of the Monterey Church of Christ and a close family friend, said Morris’ time on earth was well spent.

“Life can be taken so quickly, there’s no time to say ‘I love you,’ or ‘I’m sorry.’ His life was taken from us, but he’s fulfilled his dream,” he said.

Cutting through the quiet of a crisp, cool day, were the sobs of a community that had lost a young man they called a “gentle giant.”

The already aggrieved front row of family members were jolted to attention when three volleys were fired by the six Marines who were on hand to present his parents, Dana, and father, Rick Sr., the folded American flag and Purple Heart medal.

Shannon Bairnsfather recalled how her cousin, who’d moved with his parents to Lubbock, Texas, eight years ago, would come home and stay at her house during summers and Christmases.

“He wasn’t just another cousin,” Bairnsfather said. “He was active, he’d make you laugh. He was big, strong, sweet, a gentle giant. A tenderhearted young man. There are many, many boys still over there.

“You can’t help but feel good for them when you see them come home on TV. I just hope they don’t have to pay the price Rick did.”

The burial service was held on the property owned by Bairnsfather and her husband, Jeff. The Magnolia-Campbell Cemetery where Morris was buried lies on the same property. Morris was buried next to family members.

Morris’ lifelong friend, A.J. Smith, recalled just “hanging out” with Morris and other friends when he visited. Fond memories included tooling around in a small convertible and going to see the movies in nearby Natchez, Miss.

“At one time, he was the only one who had a license, so we needed him here to drive,” Smith joked. “There wasn’t much to do here. We just cruised. He was a true friend, real nice to everybody. A great guy.”

Lea Ann Morris recalled her late cousin’s passion for his country.

“He was a wonderful child,” she said. “He was a gentle giant, but he was intense. If he decided he wanted to do something, he’d do it. That’s how he ended up fulfilling his dream.”



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Please observe this holiday with the honor and respect that it deserves.. Take a minute to reflect quietly on the freedoms we all take for granted.. visit a cemetary and put flowers on the grave of a fallen soldier.. say a prayer for their souls.. look up a family who has lost someone and send them a letter, don't let these men and women die in vain and be forgotten.. we OWE it to them, it is our DUTY to rember them... if you want to send The Morris family an email, their addres is darmo7070@yahoo.com, or send me an email and I will give you their address...

Thank you for reading this blog.. I wish I could have been more eloquent..

My favorite gift

(Please read the entire post!!)

When I had Colton, my very favorite gifts were two home made blankets, sewn with love by my great friend (and co worker) up in Minnesota, Kathy "Wippy" Wipperling. Colton has slept with those blankets every single night of his life (except when he spends the nights with Granny or Tia Leah). As an infant, they were the PERFECT size for me to stumble through that mysterious art of swaddling.. only with those two blankets could I master it. In fact, on my to do list is to email Wippy and ask if I send her more fabric, can she make me a few more! I am worried that these will wear thin and I ... I mean, Colton.. would be devestated. (note to self, send email soon).

I think I am just blessed with amazing co workers :) I work with a wonderful lady named Jenny. When she first started, I remember thinking "oh my, I hope everyone is nice to Jenny, she seems so quiet and introverted".. WRONG first impression.. She can take care of herself.. she is witty and always quick with a comeback. She is a defender of the underdog, in a very vocal way. On days where I am down or tired, Jenny is always the one to sense that and just offer a kind word or hug.. we are constantly battling back and forth with sarcasm and pretend personal attacks.. but she is such a good friend. I have probably shared more with her about my state of mind, especially regarding the loss of Josh, than I have shared with anyone else. She is just that type of friend, the one who you feel so comfortable letting your true emotions show... and did I say brilliant.. she is super uber smart...

Well, Jenny loves to write.. it is her passion.. and she came to me today and was acting very... well, strange.. she kind of threw this paper at me and said "I wrote this for Camden.. but i feel like a dork" and basically ran out the door.

As I started to read, I could not stop my eyes as they filled with tears.. it is the most BEAUTIFUL story/gift I have ever read.. I just was so moved and can't believe the gift Jenny has with words and the fact that she shared that with me for Camden...

Enjoy:

Gifts
By Jenny Keegan

Princes in the stories never seem to get the extravagant gifts
that princesses do.

You don’t hear about fairy godmothers
handing out gifts at boys’ christenings,
of beauty and charm, grace and wit and musical aptitude.
(So that they can sing to their babies, some day,
without necessarily making them cry.)
Not even slightly more useful things:
He will have an uncanny aptitude for finding girls
based on the size of their glass slippers.

I would give him gifts, if I could.

Buckets full of tears, cried by someone else on his behalf,
every drop a coin, to pay for something,
knowledge, or wisdom –
(What did we buy with our tears?)
Knowledge, or wisdom. Something like that.
He will learn what we have learned,
and he will never have to pay the price we paid.

Novelty, to keep forever.
The world will not age with him. Every time he bites into a strawberry,
it will be his first bite.
Each river will be his first river, each sunrise his first sunrise.
He will always see as a child sees,
a brave new world,
wonder and glory.

The gift of battles won.
Water to pour on witches,
an ax for inconveniently placed beanstalks and wolves in flannel nightgowns,
a sword for slaying dragons,
courage and rightness of purpose.
He will not be defeated
by thorns or monsters, or by the fears of his own heart.

But when all’s said and done,
(I say it as a blessing
and you give it as a gift)
the gift you give him every day is this:
He will be loved.
He will live his life in the certainty of your love.